Do you tell them they haven’t done enough for you? Or do you tell them you accept them for who they are? Do you make it all about what you do for them? Or do you do for them because you want to?
We see it all the time. We know people this has happened to. They are told repeatedly they do not do enough for their partner or for their children. The result is usually not a good one. That person usually keeps trying harder and the whole time is thinking they won’t succeed. And they are right.
In the eyes of the person who tells them they aren’t enough, it won’t matter what they do, the person will never think they do enough. That person will still tell them they are a failure. That only reinforces how their family sees them at the same time making them feel horrible.
My point is this…Psychological abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse. Make sure you aren’t inflicting verbal damage on someone you claim to love. Be sure to say nice things, don’t tear them down.